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Onna Metcalf Cleans Up NicelyThe Call Her Daddy host asked what she considered a profound question. Can you think of a law that gives the government the power to make a decision about a man's body? The absent-minded presidential candidate, chuckled and said she couldn't think of any. Some critics might present obvious arguments like an involuntary military draft or perhaps even imprisonment, but what about something as simple as narcotics use? I am pretty sure the government tells us all that if we ingest certain chemicals, we become criminals. Hell, Tommy Chong got 9 months for selling bongs! And what about it being unlawful to drop a deuce on your own front yard? Too many damn rules. So ladies, don't worry. You're not being singled out here.Onna Metcalf Fruit YourselfTaylor, I feel so bad that those fake photos of you went viral. I didn't mean to hurt you like that. I confess, alcohol was involved. I am just such a big fan and my imagination got away from me. I wanted to share these fantasies with the others who admire your unmatched beauty. That's all. The only solution is to view the situation with humor. Don't take it seriously. Trust me, you're not the first and you won't be the last. The future is going to require a lot of humor. -MuskOnna Metcalf Chasing Balboa BottomsBalboa Park in San Diego is a lovely setting for portraits. I recommend that you go early in the morning before swarms of sweaty, overweight tourists arrive to obstruct the picturesque backgrounds. Onna Metcalf has a shy demeanor that had me assuming she'd be unable to pull off risky shots in public. Onna is quiet and generally keeps her emotions to herself, but one thing she is not is risk-averse. Let's all take this Monday, lay it on its back, pull its Amazon Essentials panties to the side, and remind it who is boss.Onna Metcalf Bumble FriendsHere is contestant number 8 from the challenge that I ran last year. I got to meet up with Onna Metcalf in San Diego. She is quiet, but I like quiet. I wonder which of our last two American presidents would do a better job in my occupation. Would they be competent? Creative? Coherent? I am so proud of our country. God bless.Get Notified About
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